Alright, Zero Time Dilemma got really weird, and I can see why people hate it. Lemme just do a quick rundown of some of the late-game plot twists (big spoilers, if anyone ever plans to play this game some day):
I finished Yakuza Ishin, and I absolutely loved it. 62 hours of some of the best the Yakuza series has to offer. There was a while there where I thought it might end up being my favourite game in the series, but ultimately I don't think it stuck the landing as well as 0 and 2 did for me. Which is not to say the ending isn't great (it is!), just that it relies on some historical knowledge that I think your average Japanese player might be at least vaguely familiar with, whereas a white Aussie who learnt Japanese from video games had no idea about. Not enough to spoil the game, but enough to have me thinking, "Wait, what?" at a pivotal moment.
But, oh man, what a game it was. The Yakuza series has this unspoken rule that anything goes during gameplay, but in cutscenes the games will generally follow the rules of our real world. It's the reason you can clearly murder men in gameplay, but when the cutscenes take over they simply stagger away clutching their sides and apologising, and how a gun can be only a minor annoyance in gameplay but a genuine threat in a major story cutscene. But it feels like the developers got a little frisky when making this game, and sometimes the gameplay world bleeds into the cutscene world, resulting in some outrageous moments of pure hype. At a certain point in this game characters just start cutting BULLETS out of the air, and the bosses start getting borderline DBZ powerup sequences before their fights. One guy can straight up Instant Transmission, I swear to God. It's AWESOME!
I honestly don't know why Sega never brought this game out in the West. It's easily on-par with (or better than) every other currently-localised Yakuza game, and it came out in a period early in the PS4's lifespan when people were begging for new games. Are you telling me people wouldn't want to play a sick samurai sword game? Get out of my face, you wouldn't dare. I really hope Sega rethinks their decision at some point, even if it's only when the game's up for a PS5 remaster, because way more people need to be able to play it.
And, finally, I played a little bit of that there Dark Souls Remastered. This game is, what, seven years old now, and basically universally acclaimed? I'd still never even touched a moment of it to this day. And not because I doubted what people were saying about it or anything; I was perfectly willing to believe it was the masterpiece everyone claimed it to be, I just never thought it'd be my kind of thing. I like a game where you hit a guy with a sword, but I'm also easily frustrated, and knowing what I knew about the game's notorious difficulty and punishing perma-ish-death system, I always just wrote it off as a "you fellers enjoy yourselves" kind of situation.
Buuut then this remaster came out, and it was cheap and 60FPS and, well, here we are. I played a couple of hours of it (I've just got past the angry pig with the unarmoured butthole and found an elevator back to Firelink Shrine), and, hey, it's pretty cool! It actually feels a lot better than I thought it would after seeing various bits of footage over the years. I always figured it'd be all loose and squirrelly from the way the character seems to be able to twirl on the spot and get the weightless corpses of enemies tangled around his feet, but it's actually incredible solid-feeling and responsive. And the combat, while a world away from anything resembling character action, feels great, too. It's not hard in terms of simply killing an enemy, but it requires you to think a couple of moves ahead in terms of whether there are other enemies around, where you're standing, what your stamina bar looks like and probably some other stuff I'm not thinking about yet. I like it.
So, I don't really know what I'm doing, but I just thought I'd give it a try and see how I do. I'm just playing as a Warrior, and I've been bonking fellows with a sword and occasionally a spear when I'm in a tight hallway, and I feel like I'm doing OK. I don't really know what to spend my souls on, but I figure Vitality and Endurance must be safe bets, right? I'm enjoying myself so far.
EDIT - How 'bout those Bell Gargoyles, huh? Turns out this game's pretty hard. I feel like I pretty much know what I need to know to win the fight, but now it's just a matter of putting it all together in one good run. Run to the left and circle around them when they do their flame breath attack, and dodge everything else, don't back yourself into a corner; I guess this is that "Git gud" I've heard so much about. I managed to kill one of them once, but I ran out of Estus and only had a sliver of health for the other. But I'm gonna get those guys, don't you worry.